MainEventofTheDead.com: Honkee Hatin Haiku

Tuesday, January 15, 2019

Honkee Hatin Haiku

Current mood: morose (I miss Myspace adjectives)

I apologize if the word choice offends you. I was trying to show that obscenity towards others reflects poorly on my race. That we really are all the same, so why curse others. I am sorry that I got to use the words that fit the poem structure.

A moment of genius or I am the insensitive bastard that my Creative Writing instructor thinks I am?

In the intense suns
We all appear to be chinks
Summer of yellow

After the tough fight
To the cops, all are niggers
Either that or smurfs

Pakies with backpacks
Closet, lying Christian fucks
Sinners celebrate

Border jumper work
Whites complain cuz jobs lack
Employment unclaimed

Disregard the names
Honkees, we are all the same
Why be fucking lame

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The Undrafted and Wrongfully Drafted

"Bull Durham" was not drafted on the Baseball Draft (A film that can only be drafted at #1)
"No Fear of a Black Hat" on the Fictional Band Mini-Mega Draft
The entire George Lucas Draft
"The Birdcage" instead of "La Cage Aux Folles" on the Drag Draft
"Road Trip" was not even mentioned during the Road Trip Draft
"Major League" instead of "Drop Zone" on the Wesley Snipes Draft
"Black Swan" instead of "Mermaids" on the Wynona Ryder Draft
"Akira" instead of "Ghost World" on the Comic Book Movie (Non-Super Hero) Draft. Tetsuo is a Supe.
"Now You See Me" instead of "Diggstown" on the Con Artist Movie Draft
"The Onion Movie" instead of "Everything You Always Wanted to Know About Sex * But Were Afraid to Ask" on the Sketch Comedy Anthologies Draft
"The Big Lebowski" not being marked eight on the Coen Bros. Draft
"Labrynth" or "Dark Crystal" not receiving the number 1 or 2 spot in the Jim Henson Draft
"Stage Fright" on the Giallo Draft. It is a slasher despite the presentation.
"Assault of Precinct 13" and "Prince of Darkness" Instead of "Escape from New York" and "The Thing" on the John Carpenter Draft
"Con Air" instead of "US Marshalls" and "Universal Soldier" instead of "Time Cop " on the 90's Action Draft
"WarGames" instead of "Spies Like Us" on the Cold War Draft
"Traffic" instead of "Side Effects" on the Steven Soderbergh Draft
"Fight Club" instead of "The Virgin Suicides" on the 1999 Draft ("Suicides" made the Actor Directorial Debut Draft)
Any Kirk Douglass instead of "The Shining" being on the Kubrick Draft
"Return of the Jedi" instead of "Tokyo Drift" on the Threequels Draft (there's only one "Return," okay, and it ain't "of the King," it's "of the Jedi.")

Deserves a Second Chance

Batman v. Superman: Dawn of Justice (2016).

I find the DC movies, or at least Zack Snyder, was trying to bring comic books to the big screen as opposed to adapting comic books for the big screen. If you read, (or watch the excellent animated adaptation of) "The Dark Knight Returns", it is a very slow build to the battle between the Bat and Supe. This is regarded as one of the best threads in comics.

As a guy who fell in love with wrestling in the 1980's, the very methodical showdown is what I loved. It's a love letter to comic book fans who read and note every detail and want to try figuring out the plot before the character do. Come at the flick this way, and I think you will get something out of it.

Tropic Thunder (2008)

This is a feature that dares you to be offended. When director Ben Stiller is that forthcoming like Robert Downey Sr. was with 1969's "Putney Swope", an audience saying that something is in poor taste, hence not funny, means they are afraid to make a mockery of a concept.

My own experience with junkies bankrupting me allows me to thoroughly enjoy Jack Black's making addiction seem ridiculous. Robert Downey Jr. nails his taboo performance and I would say helps the call for actors from a demographic to be the first people called on for the roles representing them. As for the "Forest Gump" knock off jokes, they serve as a way to ridicule us for what we accepted (and encouraged) as fine a decade prior. The narrative that controls the pace in the second act can drag, but the content that is delivered cannot be cut.

Tuesday, January 15, 2019

Honkee Hatin Haiku

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