Call Me Suitcase and Where was Queen's 1986 Oscar Nomination?

*Blog post started on May 19, 2020.

You figure with Florida allowing a few sports, things would finally get exciting again on the Internet. I have to wonder why I am complaining. Aside from morons protesting at state capitals to be free to kill everybody, be it with firearm or COVID-19, things are just in a holding pattern until the election. With 60% of the population actually giving a shit about their fellow human, we do not actually have to deal with any of theses assholes.

If anything, I worry about not being angsty enough to be prepared to burn this country down in the event of a Trump reelection and the Republicans maintaining control of the Senate. But, the response on Twitter to my most recent published blog "Infrequent Online Daters and Right-Wing Twitter Haters (like @shurriep)" is something I have yet to review. There are still two more days of retweeting during wrestling show hours, so there is no need to rush in seeing what kind of memes these deplorables will bombard me with if they feel insulted.

The truly insulting thing will be that they will not take the time to read any of it. At least finish the lighter portion of it to get around to calling me: 

1. A snowflake in need of validation from the opposite sex. Or
2. A faggot who just needs to accept that I like the cock instead of being a decent and considerate in terms of courting, you know "queer" stuff.

and thus my opinions about their mental states matter not, since I am the one lying to myself, like anyone who feels attacked would do to avoid considering changing their ways.

With nothing going on in terms of events, Twitter bullshit is seeming the only thing the Internet has to offer. The bank's firewalls allow for some work arounds to visit some social media, but it is not worth my job status to exploit them (frequently). Unless there are some horrific tales about the abuse of the downtrodden, it does not take long to get through all the news websites. Fortunately, "The Ringer" did have a pleasant distraction from the weekend.

The articles are now buried by "Game of Thrones" fan-fiction and articles about how the series concluding was the death of pop culture, but they had some fun stuff about 1986's "Top Gun" since the sequel "Top Gun: Maverick" was supposed to be released last Friday. I had fun being directed to topgunday.com from the call sign ranking article and finding out the bank staff's generated nicknames (Best: Goldenrod. Mine: Suitcase.), but the essay that really got my brain stimulated was the comparison of the original film to David Lynch's "Blue Velvet" by Brian Phillips called "The Subversive Sameness of ‘Top Gun’ .

Phillips's work discussed the dependency upon Oldies (I would say Classic Rock was when The Beatles started using psychedelics.) and how they both tell tales of young men growing up with surrogate parental figures. One was for the Reagan fans. The other for the open-minded. It took me a while to appreciate the latter (I reside in Champaign, so Roger Ebert's opinion has more weight with me than most.), but I did purchase it eventually. "Top Gun" was everywhere growing up and I watched the WYZZ's volleyball-free edit many a time, but as a kid, I always appreciated "Iron Eagle" more, so to spend money on a lack of Tom Cruise hetero chemistry was/is a no go.

When comparing Gun to Eagle, I got to give my two cents about aircraft. The F-14 Tomcat with its sling-wing gimmick was cool, but give me the F-16. Mach 2 with one engine and no need for a navigator (Radar Intercept Officer for you military buffs) sounds better. Goose and Meg Ryan would live happily ever after despite Iceman pulling off so abruptly.

I really should not get into fighter jet arguments. It was a preadolescence fascination, but not being as smart at engineering nerds, flashbacks of being mocked for my preferences arise. In the end, Fuck the F-18 hornet for going Matt Hardy on the F-14 and making me seem dim to guys who cannot throw a punch.

And after all this "Top Gun" revisionist history, I really need to get myself "Iron Eagle" in high def. Is it a great movie? No, but I would venture to say it was as fun as "The Last Starfighter". Maybe I just needed sequels to "Starfighter" to eliminate the need for a ridiculous story about rescuing your dad from pseudo-Libyans.

Are there right-wing nuts who have a greater appreciation for Eagle because of that? Fucking Benghazi. Those conservative cocksuckers would have obviously missed the point on "Iron Eagle" if that was the case.

Perhaps the Louis Gossett Jr. franchise was a subconscious trigger for my rebellious side. The military's authority was the true antagonist in all of the films. The films were about doing the right thing, not being part of the establishment. 25 years removed, I wonder how many oil fields Maverick has torched without rescuing anyone? Doug at least got one of us back.

And that is another thing that justifies "Iron Eagle V" instead of "Top Gun II". Your protagonists are Chappy and Doug. They do not need those overly masculine call signs. The best call sign was Goose. It was not anything overly aggressive. And that is why he was offed. Was it not?

As I type all this up, the songs from the Tony Scott film's are playing through my head. I had a tendency to buy soundtracks for movies my parents were hesitant to let me see ("La Bamba" was my first cassette.). It is a solid soundtrack, at least the A-side. The B-side at least has Steve Stevens's "Top Gun Anthem", but Giorgio Moroder was lacking, so I would end up listening to "Danger Zone" and flipping over the cassette if I really needed the best guitar track of that decade. This leads me to wonder if I needed more of a compilation soundtrack instead, like the jet movie OST with Dio, Twisted Sister, George Clinton, and MOTHERLOVING QUEEN.

In all seriousness, the cohesive nature of Giorgio Moroder is more worthy of $13 bucks (that's the price of CD's now. Right?), but I do appreciate the masculine vibe of the other soundtrack. Neither film is for the ladies. What I appreciate more is "One Vision" over "Take My Breath Away" though Berlin's song with that title is better than the Freddie Mercury penned "You Take My Breath Away". Symphonic and rocking kicks the shit out of any ballad.

I now realize I downplayed the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Science crime from 1986. Where were Mercury, May, Deacon and Taylor's gold statuette. Especially when the best soundtrack of that year was that of "Highlander" (Sorry David Bowie's "Labyrinth"). It was bad enough overlooking "Flash Gordon" six years prior.

"Top Gun" was propaganda for its time. Do we really need a Trump-themed time capsule via a sequel? Gossett's stock in on the uptick after "Watchmen", so give me "Chappy Rides Again." Or better yet, let us have an "Iron Eagle" reboot with Barack Obama as the titular father figure. How could anyone pass that up?

I may have to listen to Queen + Adam Lambert's request for fried chicken before determining if that would be worth greenlighting.

Behance.com - Going Back for Dad.

Airbats 801 - Iron Eagle 4

It is cool that Angelfire is still around. It is also cool that if you look hard enough, you can find most of the GeoCities websites preserved on a server. If only "@Midnight" was still a thing. It is a shame that they will never capitalize on that content.

Angelfire may have kept my post GeoCities/Web Design Certification (icc.edu) site up the past 17 years, but with Yahoo's betrayal, if you have not created an operating system, I am going to put all my eggs in one basket. Thus, I am going to start moving the original AnimeFlow over to the Blogger sphere. So let us get over one repetitive tangent (look at all the It and I) and getting into repeating my earliest critical works.

801 T.T.S. Airbats: 1st Strike
© 1994 Toshimisu Shimizu / Tokuma Shoten - JVC
Length: 90 minutes (3 episodes)

Audience Age: 12+

Opinion: Well animated, average story. This is a review of the dubbed VHS version.

From the creator of the hentai title Rei Rei

If you have seen the previews for 801 T.T.S. Air Bats, you probably were able to gain the basic premise of the series which is girls plus jets means $21.60 worth of entertainment. To a certain extent, girls plus anything out of the ordinary will bring some profit in this animation genre, and when a sensitive but less than with it guy is thrown in the mix, the creator is assured an audience. The concept is cute and one will laugh in an on again off again pattern, but if it is not a "Tenchi Muyo" or an "El-Hazard" video, the consumer may have some regrets about the purchase.

801 gets a few bonus points from me since learning about jets was once a hobby of mine, but otherwise it is a lot like what I expect from one of these "girls meet boy, they meet…what was that again?" animes.

Check out the rest of this critique at AnimeRuss.blogspot.com - For those curious about anime but hate the geeks

3/8/12: Don't you think our flag is lame?

I'm trying to come up with a tattoo idea. Oh, the nuisance I can be to myself after adjusting to second shift sleeping hours. Especially when I got to take the cat to the vet, go to the dentist and pay a speeding ticket.

Damn Chillicothe for building its town on a state highway. If you don't want me to go 44 in a 35 (I blame Five Man Electric Band for me not seeing the 30 mph sign...or should I say Tesla), then put some projects around the road like Peoria. You gotta drive safe on Adams because you don't want to get into a hit and run. If you do hit a pedestrian, the paranoia of desperate poor folks won't allow you to leave your car to check on the victim or wait for the authorities. A catch 22, or should I say a catch 29.

But Chilli makes all their money on traffic violations, and we don't want to cripple their chances of getting a Family Video or a KFC to complete the Pepsi fast food trifecta. I don't think it would hurt Dream Illustration's business though.

So back to the tattoo idea. I was thinking of using the English flag, the St George, not the Union Jack (screw the Scots and Irish). I'm thinking in the top left quarter adding a hammer and sickle or the Nerv logo from Neon Genesis Evangelion. Some how, I know which melding would not be "got."

Originally, I was considering using the Le Tigre feminist anthem FYR with the Nerv logo, but it was a good friend who reminded me how esoteric that would be. Thanks Adult Swim for ruining anime and JD Sampson for killing a new riot grrrl era to focus on the butch crying.

These ideas come from America having a flag with zero versatility. The flags with perpendicular bars or open fields allow for variations to the design. Just wiki British or Scandinavian flags and you will understand this arrangement.

Even wiki Soviet flags to see how they kept the defining image of the nation while using the red space to get creative. Actually watch "Rocky 4." Drago's visage on the Soviet banner was far more classy than Apollo's entrance monstrosity. I shouldn't speak ill of the dead, James Brown was still cool despite that.

There is too much going on with the stars and stripes. Only rock bands see it fit to replace the stars, and if it isn't something hip or hateful (I just got a feeling white power douche bags have given the blue field a hint of Hitler) 'Muricans find it in poor taste.

Or they'll find inspiration for a Swayze/Sheen resistance movement. And since my dad went to Michigan State, fuck all wolverines.

If my dream of a United Socialist States of America comes to fruition, I don't want to be a new age Lt Guile. Someone who couldn't come up with a way to incorporate them stars and stripes into a work of art and just gets a tattoo of the current flag because of an excessively low amount of creativity.

At least with using the St. George and the communist standby, I'm paying homage to my main heritage and my political values.

As for those close minded Americans who think the Soviets were evil, unless you were a member of the Masterson family or Chappy Sinclair, there is no reason to be pissy at them. Hell, even Louis Gossett Jr. got over it by the end of that "Iron Eagle II."

The Hammer and Sickle is definitely less offensive than the Rebel flag. We never agreed with the Soviets, but they never enslaved any of our races (beating to submission had no guarantees of a docile work force). I find it silly that we honor a failed nation that was based on the ownership of other people just because they stood up to the people who had common sense and who genuinely gave a shit.

In a way, this tattoo idea is kind of a fuck you to those who consider their pride of being backwards hicks. Backwards hicks who believe any idea not from this land is a bad one. Hate to break it to you, if it isn't a vaccine or space exploration, all the good ideas come from outside this country. Hell, the stingy Tea Parties have lead to outsourcing those things.

A tattoo to piss off conservatives and crackers. I think that is why UFC veteran Jeff Monson is one of the toughest fighters around. If you have that kind of ink, you got to be ready to back it up. Since Tap Out doesn't incorporate that southern flag into their gear, I don't think there will be anyone I'll have to sweat about sporting this ink.

Maybe the Irish, but in all likelihood, they'd be too drunk to be dangerous.