Showing posts with label Milla Jovovich. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Milla Jovovich. Show all posts

Thursday, January 4, 2024

TARDIS, Kangaroo, The Bear, & Trauma + Milla Jovovich - 2, Winona Ryder - 1 (Presented by AllysAccessoriesShop)

Ninety For Chill: The #Podcast with @CatBusRuss

Episode 148: TARDIS, Kangaroo, The Bear, & Trauma

A podcast with too much for the Queen Kitty to understand

TARDIS, Kangaroo, The Bear, & Trauma

Wednesday, December 6, 2023

Help NinetyForChill: The #Podcast get away from paywalls by subscribing to "Ninety For Chill: The Podcast with CatBusRuss".

Who needs weird, Thanksgiving uncle drama when you can spend your post retail Black Friday vacation discussing the kids' films that traumatized us? Be it eventual trepidations towards animated musicals or live action films that tells Walt Disney's "Bambi" to "hold my beer" when it came to killing forest critters.

With that being ⁠ThePoeticCritic⁠'s suggestion for a podcast topic, ⁠CatBusRuss⁠ thinks it was wise to open the show with a conversation about her trip to the most recent edition of ⁠Chicago TARDIS⁠. It is the "⁠Doctor Who⁠" convention that fills the void left by Rosemont's "Visions" comic con that ended 25 years ago.

After reminiscing about how great viewing rooms were at conventions, the two embark on providing a brief history of The Disney Channel and Nickelodeon before they spent money on programming. For Nick, they filled the time with package features on Sundays. For the House of Mouse, the time was more than likely filled with imported children features like "⁠Dot and the Kangaroo⁠". But if you wanted real trauma, turn to pre-prime time HBO offering of a French nature drama, "⁠The Bear⁠".

White washing the Australian Bush or wondering where the hell the American Humane Association was when there were live animals dealing with fates equal to those of Nicolas Cage in "The Wickerman", ⁠Russ⁠ left this binge with some reopened scars he never knew he had from childhood.

 

Ninety For Chill: The #Podcast with @CatBusRuss

Episode 149: Milla Jovovich - 2, Winona Ryder - 1 (Presented by AllysAccessoriesShop)

Eva is the true queen on the screen

Milla Jovovich - 2, Winona Ryder - 1 (Presented by AllysAccessoriesShop)

Wednesday, December 13, 2023

Help NinetyForChill: The #Podcast get away from paywalls by subscribing to "Ninety For Chill: The Podcast with CatBusRuss".

⁠To conclude this year's edition of ⁠"AllysAccessoriesShop on Etsy⁠'s Trash Feature Revue", ⁠CatBusRuss⁠ does his best to pit two actresses against each other. The girl of his offbeat film preadolescence, ⁠Winona Ryder⁠, and the woman of his low-brow cinema adulthood, ⁠Milla Jovovich⁠. How did "⁠The Fifth Element⁠'s" Leeloo defeat "⁠Beetlejuice⁠'s" Lydia Deetz? How convoluted is this episode going to be?

Wednesday, September 27, 2023

Imagine We Still Had VHS: Kurozuka

*This blog post was started on September 19, 2023.

Lets see how quick that I can release this post. I do not intend to rush it, but, after further work on setting up a couple of podcast episodes with a follower to my Mastodon account (@russstevens@mastodon.social), staying up past midnight yesterday was not wise. Eventually, the body will give up on me, and that means I may be held responsible for a poor start to the next season of Whaddayaknow trivia.

I should not be so hard on myself. This is because, it seems that I am realizing my bad dreams. A couple of Fridays ago, my day at the primary retailer started with an old, entitled, xenophobic woman expecting me to accept an exchange or refund for ink cartridges that were three months past the return period. She had to drive 10 miles to get to the store, so she does not find it unacceptable to expect satisfaction despite the fine print. The woman did not understand that you cannot buy products you did not need and expect us to take in them back because they did not work five months later. My previous unconscious period featured a dream about me being stalked by two elderly people demanding I give them a printer despite my lack of knowledge about the products. Why did this dream get manifested?

Perhaps I need to return to therapy. There needs to be a way for me to have dreams that will result in a windfall of millions of dollars. Am I up for that gamble of possibly $50 weekly? As I found out from the last attempt, my schedule just does not allow for that. And I just cannot get to Peoria enough to find my dancer friends who are using BetterHelp.

Big Al's has got to get their shit together to actually encourage the stages to be staffed. And I cannot help to wonder if some Jewish hackers have attacked their Facebook. The business hardly posts and now nothing but weird Hebrew memes. At least I am not the only one who needs to get my life in order.

If I had all my ducks in a row, I probably would not be complaining about this anime gamble. It is 11 pm, and I am feeling gassed. What should I have expected for betting on myself after my history of losing? Not that same bitch coming back to my store expecting me to give them a replacement product despite they did not bring that product in.

This was handed off to a manager, who hated that headache, but I was not going to be the guy to make the decision to lose $40 of product based on her promise. A widow should feel free to demand accommodations. The moment she once again said that I did not know how to read a receipt, the other customers hearing my response to that manager asking why I drug him into this scenario was not something I will regret.

The irony, that manager stopped by my liquor job after they got off work. If only I could drink away the previous shift instead of providing the escape to my primary job's reluctant coworkers.

I suppose I should mention that I decided to drink Wild Turkey 101 as I watched this anime followed by half a bowl of indica. For those who appreciate my Japanese animation reviews, my going above and beyond to make this post happen needs to result in them passing this blog post around. If not, they are sucking my midweek lifeforce away.

And there is your (hyperbolic) transition to the topic in the title.

https://www.pinterest.com/bestbuy/

Kurozuka: Episodes 1-3

*This blog post was resumed on September 20, 2023.

In twelve century Japan, a member of samurai royalty, Kuro, is on the run from a seemingly demonic rival clan alongside his retainer Benkei. After fending off another attack, Kuro's exhaustion results in the need for shelter. It seems fortunate that Benkei finds a house off in the distance that seems to be occupied. There is a risk of an ambush, but what options do they have?

They arrive to find the only person living there is a woman. The beautiful Kuromitsu takes immediate pity on the two and seems fascinated by Kuro. Benkei requests to stay the night, but Kuromitsu notices Kuro's fever and offers the two board until he is well. There is just one stipulation. She lives in the backroom of the house. Be it privacy or embarrassment over the state of the room, the two samurai are not allowed to enter it.

The next morning, Benkei leaves to find a friendly village to find medicine for his master. While he searches, under Kuromitsu's watch, Kuro slowly recovers. It maybe Florence Nightingale syndrome, but the host and guest start developing feelings for each other. Sadly, Kuromitsu assures Kuro that hey can never be together.

One night, Kuro awakens to a sense that something is wrong. Following his intuition, he enters Kuromitsu's forbidden room to find her feeding on the blood of a dead man. Before the two can makes sense of what is going on, Kuro's enemies have arrived at the house and severs the right hand of the host. Our protagonist puts up a great fight, but is eventually mortally wounded. Before his foes can finish him, Kuromitsu kills them all with little effort.

Circumstances have obviously changed. Kuromitsu takes Kuro into the forest. She invites him to be at her side...for eternity. Not wanting to die and being infatuated with Kuromitsu, he takes her up on the offer. The two drink each other's blood, and Kuro's wounds rapidly heal. This is good because his attackers have returned, but their leader makes it clear, they are their for the woman.

Kuro fends them off until Benkei returns. As he and Kuromitsu try to assess the situation, Benkei beheads his master.

Being immortal now, Kuro regains consciousness and finds his torso attached to his head. As he searches for his lover, he finds a huge, former metropolis. It is a metropolis that must be at least 800 years younger than the one he knew. Kuromitsu is still his obsession, so regardless of the world he finds himself in, his only goal is to find his lover from centuries prior.

This task will be a greater challenge than he could expect, because it maybe trivial to what is happening to the rest of the world. The Imperial Red Army seems to rule this new Japan. They bare the mark of Kuro's rivals, and they are even more evil than before, eliminating any civilians that inconvenience them. For Kuro, it maybe convenient vengeance. For the resistance, he maybe their only hope.

*This blog post was resumed on September 21, 2023.

Pardon the start-stop nature of the blog. The lesson is to watch the videos on Wednesday and write the post on Thursday. Mondays can be late due to the podcast production. Tuesdays should be dedicated to recovering from Monday. Wednesdays should leave me somewhat recharged.

"Kurozuka" has an enticing premise. It is like "Interview with the Vampire", but centered around action instead of drama, let alone horror. The samurai twist makes it accessible to anime fans and for those wanting something different from their vampire entertainment.

This series was part of a $15 DVD set which I purchased for "Ultraviolet: Code 44", a spinoff of the Milla Jovovich movie. All of the series were productions from the Madhouse animation studio. It is a studio that I was very familiar with, but the entire concept of three, seemingly forgotten series, I thought the studio had been stretched thin. Hell, they sold out to Sony to try and make something worthwhile from a bad movie.

"Kurozuka's" art is not as bold as most of the anime that has made it stateside, and I find that refreshing. It has more of a manga feel instead of shows that have obtained international attention. With that said, there is nothing innovative about it, just comforting.

Unfortunately, when bundled with two other series that feature the same style, I think that hinders its ability to be sold. It just does not look exceptional. And after writing that, the realization that they all have a cyberpunk aesthetic. 39 episodes of the same means that only the "Ultraviolet" apologists would buy this. One would hope that parents have the sense to know anime is not for kids.

This show is not for kids. The violence is too much fun for that, at least in the first two episodes. Once you introduce the innocent, persecuted masses, they hold back at times on the graphic violence. It successfully uses hip effects of the time (Vivid colors during our hero's crazed moments.), but does not innovate. As for the soundtrack, the score and songs are of the time, thus, not something I will go out of my way to download.

Despite not looking or sounding unique, I cannot help but be encouraged by the story. Vampires are an easy concept for me to bite at. (Pun was not intended.) Demons versus samurai never really intrigued me. Maybe that is Eurocentric bias. All of the old, Japanese demon stories that I have come across seem too convoluted, at least when they try to incorporate it with other Japanese-centric genres. It just seems more fun to clash two totally different cultures.

What I found fascinating about "Kurozuka" is that the tale takes the time to establish different time periods. If you like both the feudal and the dystopic setting, this series allows you to have your cake and eat it too.

Now did it do this in the best way possible? Probably not. You do not realize the twist (unless you take into consideration the frantic open credits) until the end of the second episode. They could have taken some pointers from "Highlander: The Series" or anime "Highlander: The Search for Vengeance".

If it was a multiple episode OVA, the surprise of our vampire awakening 800 years later would work. Having a first episode that takes place entirely in the 12th century, it is just another vampire show. All it would have taken was a cyberpunk intro to let us know what the hero is currently dealing with. A clever transition to a flashback, and you have fried gold.

"Kurozuka" is a unique premise and an exciting enough series to keep the audience intrigued. It just does not start off correctly to provide intrigue. If you did not buy this as a package (DVD set), I do not know if you would stick around for another vampire cartoon. This may not have worked as a TV show, but a $5 anime collection, it is indeed worthwhile.

Tuesday, November 23, 2021

NinetyForChill: The #Podcast - ThePoeticCritic Down Under

NinetyForChill.com: The #Podcast

Episode 45: ThePoeticCritic Down Under

Films Researched for this Podcast: Mad Max 2: The Road Warrior (1981); Resident Evil: Extinction (2007); Jolt (2021); Into the Dark: Tentacles (2021).

Eva Eva Eva, Oi Oi Oi


In time for "Resident Evil: Welcome to Racoon City", Cool Movies Darth revisits Russell Mulcahy's "Resident Evil: Extinction". This Australian-helmed feature allows him to pick the brain of ThePoeticCritic who offers some insight into Australian Exploitation cinema. The most highly regarded of these features being "Mad Max 2: The Road Warrior". She is fine with George Miller's efforts but has a fascination with exploitation.
 
Pardon the lack of "Bluey" love in this episode, but NinetyForChill.com is all about killing canines to progress a narrative.
 

 
This is the lost conversation with ThePoeticCritic from two months ago. The dead puppy tangent that I introduced here to compare "Mad Max 2" to other great, brutal action movies was something that I felt needed to be further elaborated on. Patron saint of the podcast Stuart Gordon has a penchants to kill cats in his horror movies (and lovable ants in his family fare), the scale must be balanced.

This is a shorter episode because there was probably too little time for my sister and I to get on the same page since our From Dreamy Nocturna to A Nightmare on Elm St. episode. I believe this was when I was trying to arrange a chat with Andras from the "Ta2squid Podcast". Unfortunately, my failure to remember how time zones worked sank that proposed episode. On the flip side, needing to spend a Hot Topic coupon did introduce me to the awesomeness of stinger jeans.

So it takes sometime to get this episode rolling, but once I asked her opinion on whether or not Russell Mulcahy is nothing more than a George Miller wannabe, her cinematic knowledge starts flowing. I am glad that the editing process allowed me to be reintroduced to her documentary suggestion, "Not Quite Hollywood: The Wild, Untold Story of Ozploitation!".
 
 
 
This does bring us back to the 1980s. We recall seeing "Labyrinth" for the first time, and me being confused about David Bowie until he spoke in his role as the Goblin King. I swore that was the same villain from "Mad Max: Beyond the Thunderdome". It was the mid-80s, Tina Turner was everywhere.

This leads us to a conversation about how David Bowie was supposed to portray Max Zorin. When he turned it down, the role was taken up by Christopher Walken in perhaps his least Walken performance. TPC suggested that I dive back into the "'80s All Over Podcast" to find the story behind that confusion. I will withhold that plunge until I see how Part 2 of the "James Bond Screen Drafts" plays out. Drew McWeeny did not allow "On Her Majesty's Secret Service" to be in the top five. My trust in him maybe lost.
 
In all fairness, this podcast is not going to be Ozploitation heavy. I do bring up a couple of the movies that I knew the Ta2squid team had discussed. One of those features is "Jolt", an Amazon Prime Video Original action movie starring Kate Beckingsale. It left me perplexed to why she is allowed to speak with her natural accents while the rest of the cast (except for David Bradley) has to Americanize their. If you listen to the "Australian 21st Century Screen Draft", the drafters might have explained the charm (or lack there) of Jai Courtney.

Another feature that I had watched that was inspired by Ta2squid was "Into the Dark: Tentacles". It is not Lovecraftian. It is not hentai. It is...made for TV.

My Twitter account is @catbusruss. This is where I want your hate to be directed if you disapprove. Otherwise, positive feedback would be best displayed as subscriptions to my podcast and five-star reviews. Lets work that algorithm.

If you think you have a film or franchise that you are an expert on. Send an email to russthebus07@gmail.com. Most franchises have at least one feature that will qualify for NinetyForChill. The runtime just needs to be between 74 and 99 minutes. We have four episodes to fill.
 
I have been asking for weeks for assistance in composing an episode dedicated to vampire features like "The Lost Boys" trilogy, "Near Dark", and the "Underworld" movies. Here is to hoping that this bunch of critiques will stir up some inspiration in my audience to step up and hold off on the garlic. If this is a topic you up for discussing, feel free to send an email to russthebus07@gmail.com. All I need is a half hour on Zoom to get this done.

I hope I am impressing or at the very least amusing you with this podcast and I am open to any and all criticism. My biggest want is more guests and more suggestions on what to chat about (@catbusruss, russthebus07@gmail.com@coolmoviesdarth). If we can get 3 hours out of "Little Nicky", the possibilities are endless. Thanks for visiting.

 
After WrestleMania Backlash, I will tell you that we need to take zombie pro wrestling back. My suggestion is that we finally get my low-budget zombie movie, "Main Event of the Dead" off the ground. The script lacks a lumberjack match, so you know it has got to be better than the "Army of the Dead" advertisement. Ask for a treatment or give me suggestions on how to get it to a crowd-sourcing stage with an email to russthebus07@gmail.com.

Wednesday, March 4, 2020

"Kickboxer: Retaliation" How to Warrant 110 Minutes and I, the Retarded Garland


I have been in a fried state since C2E2. It was quite the learning experience. This was an experience that someone who turned 40 during it may have not been ready for. Maybe movie and pro-wrestling geekdom was too much to handle for someone who has close of 20 years of aspiration to make a mark in one of those fields.

It is good to know that I am only 15 years behind Alex Garland. His first novel was at 26 and I had not even started writing fiction until I was 27. Since "The Beach" was based on his vagabonding adventures and I am an underemployed pro-wrestler (I may not be working, but I am already open.), perhaps my mistake was abandoning "With a Capital C (working title)" to complete the script for my low-budget, pro-wrestling zom-com, "Main Event of the Dead". Feel free to email me a request for the treatment or offer advice on how to get it out of development hell at russthebus07@gmail.com. There is an order to things that I did not follow properly.

If only I knew the proper order when ending a relationship. I guess it was destiny for this blog to be hastily put together. It turns out that the amount of head trips that I had typed up was used up. Should I be worried about discussing things with about my better quarter? (Eva the Cat will always get half, but regardless of relationship status, she deserve a percentage.) There is a good chance this blog will not end up on her Facebook feed. But, I will not see her till probably after "AEW Dynamite" airs, so I might end up posting this before "the talk".

It is a new experience for me. My first relationship was in junior high, so to find out a week after the relationship started that she wanted to pursue my best friend, that was no big deal. The second relationship that started 13 years later, there was a lot of drama when it came to how it ended, but my insensitivity towards her and my ignorance about relationships were the root causes. This time around, compatibility may have just worn itself out, and that is a tough thing to accept. Hence why I want to have talk to her, it is just there are stakes this time. I am just wondering if it my ego or my heart that will be broken up.

But the lack of communication over and early bed time from her being upset that she had to fulfill the C2E2 obligations at least allows me to knock out a movie review for ninetyforchill.com. The only problem was determining movies that I have access to see, have yet to see, she might want to see (like "Paradise Hills" with Awkafina and Milla Jovovich), and what I was in the mood for. Relationship turmoil did not seem right for any Gregg Araki films.

My solution, turn that to a physical expression of turmoil in the form of "Kickboxer: Retaliation" a sequel to the 2016 reboot that I really enjoyed. Now this film was one hour and fifty minutes, so you may say, why does this qualify for a website that puts a cap on length at 97 minutes (You will never know how many movies you own that end at 1:38 until you enter an endeavor like ninetyforchill.com.)?

That is because, if you were able to establish a universe in your first film, you get to expand it in your sequels. "John Wick" was just over an 1:45. "John Wick: Chapter 2" was nearly 2 hours 10 minutes. Did we complain about that? No, because Jonathan earned it.


Friday, January 17, 2020

"Equilibrium" - Christian Bale Polishes "Ultraviolet..."

...but a shiny turd is still a turd.

The difference between a good bad movie and a piece of shit is fun. Poor cinematography, bad acting, ridiculous scripts, these can call be forgiven as long as you are too busy having fun. "The Rise of Skywalker", "The Phantom Menace", and "Attack of the Clones" are films that I still enjoy because of my "Star Wars" fandom.

"Rise" has an incoherent script, but, I cannot help but  pop for the heavy-handed fan service. The second time I saw it in a theater, when I saw all the flash armada, tears were being help back at the beauty of the concept. "Menace" and "Clones" dialogue for Natalie Portman and Hayden Christianson is beyond awful, but the story it was explaining made sense to me. Who can be pissed at an abundance of Jedi anyhow?

If you go through my blog "Best 2019 Ninety-Minute (or 97 min) Films for Chilling", only two of the movies are undeniably good (I will argue that "Yoga Hosers" was exactly what it set out to be, but that may not make it good in the eyes of some.). Do I appreciate the excellent movies more? Yes. Do I frequently have more than an hour forty to devote to one. With two jobs and at least 20 video games to play, would you suspect that I did?

Well, if it is a monthly "Star Wars" flick, I will make the time for it.

The point is, if you want to get the most out your cinema time, you have to expand your horizons. Of course the downside is, 50 percent of what is out on the shelves is genuine crap.

Now, I have been able to make some films fun. Like "Ultraviolet". Surely by watching it enough, I can find a way to salvage and appreciate it. Timur Bekmambetov may have.

I am sorry, Timur did not. That is how bad the effects and direction were "Ultraviolet". They were so bad that I thought the film predated both "Night Watch" and "Day Watch". So, reopening a movie review (and ICC's Chinese 211) notebook and finding my review for "Equilibrium", a film by "Ultraviolet" writer/director Kurt Wimmer, spawned my justification for watching bad movies and brief reevaluation of having a website devoted to 90 minute films.

20 (give or take) new reviews posted last year, three to four were weak. This means I spent nine hours watching crap. If poop is not in my Pornhub search history, why do I let it be in my queues when I could catch up on my Scorsese? That is enough time to get three films in. Good thing one of them is "Taxi Driver" at two hours.

Reddit Quote Porn
Equilibrium

I could not have been the only one who was skeptical about any movie with this a quote from WBAI's nameless critic:
FORGET "THE MATRIX"! This Movie Will Blow You Away!
I suppose I should be skeptical of any quote formatted like that. Shout or get off the pot.

Action wise, "Underworld" eventually gave us a new approach to the sleek style of the Wachowski Sisters. Sci-fi wise, how can you dream of trying to capture what that film had? Also, the English leads in "Existenze" and "Equilibrium" added some unwanted pretention to the genre that was already overly pretentious to begin with.

It was not until "Ultraviolet" attempted to presented a world "you may not understand" that I dared to venture into Kurt Wimmer's bleak not so distant future(s). I figured 10 years had passed since super Jovovich from the "Fifth Element", so it was time to give the machine overlord-free future action flicks another chance. Unfortunately, Wimmer's film was too much about making the lead out to be hotter than Beckingsale and lacked any real substance. That was quite an accomplishment since the film featured both vampires and futuristic gun play.

Recently, some friends recommended Equlibrium to me. It has been a decade since "The Matrix" (The draft for this review was written in 2009.), and it is not a Bale sequel ("The Dark Knight" was bloated and wasted too many DC characters.), so it should be worthwhile...right?

I looked at the DVD's box to discover that is was also directed by Wimmer, so as an aspiring film critic, this gave me an opportunity. It would be a film that could be bad or good that should be nice and easy to view with no bullshit middle ground to describe. The problem now is the film's title is literal, "Equilibrium" is all middle ground and a waste of 110 minutes.

In the 21st century, a father figure had determined that human emotion has nearly brought humanity to the brink of extinction. With no perceived wants, hate and jealousy cannot exist because there would no longer be reason to use them. Love causes irrational acts, so it only hurts mankind.

As long as members of this society keep on their dosage of a drug to subdue their emotions, the world will prosper through conformity. If any member of the Libria has an emotion, they will be incinerated to maintain equilibrium. The Father's clerics are trained to search and destroy threats to the society.

Cleric Preston is the best, but after having to kill his partner over contraband, he is second guessing his purpose to exist. When he captures his partner's lover, he starts to learn what can be gained by having feelings. Now he must determine what is more important, peace or humanity. Stand and destroy nonconformists or attack and introduce the world to what they have lost.

As a director, I do not see how Wimmer has fans to support him. (Since he has not directed a film since 2006, I think this observation indicated that he does not have the fans suggested). Perhaps it is because of Gun Kata, "his" kung-fu gun play hybrid. To me, this is his clever way to cover up his inability to direct or write action sequences.

In his directorial efforts, Wimmer has few great action sequences, but they are not based on his attempts to rip of chapter 29 of "The Matrix". His protagonist effortlessly lays waste to armies of adversaries, and in "Equilibrium", it is pathetic to watch. The hero is never threatened, so there is no reason to feel involved. The viewer eventually wants the hero to take a slug or two.

Since he does have the ability to catch an occasional action scene right, he should not rely on tricks like scenes in absolute darkness. These scenes may show his vision as a director. It seems that he is trying to capture  storyboards shots, so actual motion is secondary. When one is directing a motion picture, to ignore the motion part makes it seem like the director has missed the point.

With "Equilibrium", Wimmer at least shows some ability as a writer. The world he created in this film is logical. Our hero has to overcome something that he is aware of, and the story tells his struggle well. Which is an accomplishment with all of the sudden twists that do not show up till the stories fourth act. It does seem to run long because the hero is trying to maintain his mental/emotional density. Again, you wish for something bad would happen to him for his own sake.

Bale is able to shine as the cleric. Like his performance in "Public Enemies", you can see his emotional struggle between what he should do and what he must do. With no Johnny Depp, to share the film with, it allows for a greater appreciation of his talents.

Of course, if he was going to do this in a flawed film, I would rather it have been in "Terminator Salvation", a film that only story problem is based to that series's continuity.

Seeing "Equilibrium" only encourages a subpar talent to remain subpar. Bale's performance is great, and the story is compelling, but the action will make the audience cringe. "Equlibrium" is "Two Girls, One Cup". It is fun to talk about, but not to watch.