Current mood: Accomplished
The sweet aroma of desperation like that of a foul fruit seems to be a proper scent for Mayor Jim Ardis and Regent Broadcasting. Perhaps it is not their aroma, but the stench from an entire crate of the rotten ovaries they might be carrying.
I am discussing the further efforts to bring AC/DC to Peoria. Is it too late to scare the right wing with the gay name theory?
That probably would not work since it is the god-fearing, mullet-sporting, Pekin Walmart-shopping red necks who think a Desert Eagle was made for possum hunting. Beyond these folks and aging pro wrestlers, who else would go to an AC/DC rally?
Why must it be AC/DC? Is it for the old guys who listen to 105.7 the X in the morning in an effort to be hip before they change the station to catch the Bob and Tom rewind? Is that what makes them the only noise to stench up the two largest towers in Peoria?
I'll admit, Aerosmith has gotten a little lame since the ironic occurrence of the "Jaded" single, but at least they give work to the youthful future starlets.
And for those who say, "Mila Kunis?" I'll respond with, "Yes." The Griffins treat Meg like the Press treats Lindsey.
I can't say we need the boys from Boston back in Peoria (I wouldn't mind it), but if I got to listen to one post 86 Australian Craptastic Douche Cassette per hour, could I at least hear one from the Alicia Silverstone trilogy?
And why is there no Iron Maiden played from the "More Power" tower? For every evil deed Bon sang and Brian fakes, one Dickinson track will produce ten times the sin. Perhaps we should all dress up as Eddie to frighten the potential 10,000 hicks. Wouldn't you rather have the attention of the first group to shout 666 than the spawn of England's prison colony (2019: sorry for implying AC/DC as convicts, I did not know the offense Australians take to that)?
There's a pitch. If you are pro AC/DC, you are anti-aborigine. That is exactly what the world needs, some Native Australian tunes (and Aboriginal Casinos). It would serve as a good balance to the Peruvian flute bands.
I don't think Motorhead has played Peoria. Yes, I know Lemmy is supposed to live forever, but do we want to take that chance.
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It could be said that the fast noise of Motorhead was inspired by Anal Cum Dumpster Compact disc, but Peoria and Peoria radio has chosen to play the predecessor and prevent perfection from airing. This has got to stop.
But what to do? There is a good chance a heat-packing militia will be gathered on Jan 10 in the center of Peoria. We can only hope for subzero weather to allow natural selection to rid us of Ardis's hopeful allies.
Is it just me, but I don't remember Jim Maloof to be this annoying. If you are bitching about the city funds being spent on a logo instead of schools, why are you not thoroughly annoyed by the commercial on air and TV claiming it is better here.
It isn't better here. Has Reznor blessed us with his presence?
The commercials, the logo, they are Ardis's scheme to dumb Peoria down to maintain his seat. He has ambitions to be "El Mayordente for Life." The Fuhrer of Fulton St.
He's trying to gather his sheep like troops for a rally Saturday. It is our duty to prevent this. But how?
A counter protest may only make AC/DC feel even stronger for playing Peoria. It would be even worse to give them momentum to possibly record another album.
It will be tough, distasteful, and tacky, but we must attempt to offend the band so much that only the truly wise would return to our "fair city."
Yes, those who appreciate Islamic protest videos. To do that, we have to smoke a huge pile of Australian flags.
Political ramifications? Who cares? I'm not a Baz Luhrmann fan. I think all who read my blogs can agree, new AC/DC cannot be tolerated in the land where the unfortunate come to die.
Sadly, I am booked outside of town, so I cannot lead the protest, but the spirit can be expressed by anyone.
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