I feel like driving east to the town where I would say nine are hailing from. The only time I really paid attention to that village was when I dropped off my first true friend with benefits off at her parents house after she put in six hours at the West Peoria establishment then known as Fantasyland. She was fun company, but the most worthwhile benefits was probably hanging out with her cats. Needless to say, regardless of the benefits, convincing me to drive 100 miles in the early morning was not a challenge.
FUN FANTASY BASEBALL MEMES IMAGES |
Of course, it was not until the father with a beer in a hand who got annoyed and told the kids to return to the lounge. The juvenile version of the most dangerous game was halted, and for once I say some genuine attempt to parent.
This all reminds me of a morning at my retail job where alarms for expensive items kept going off as parents let their children roam the store. Management did not approve of my suggestion, but they seemed to enjoy the idea of cutting off a finger of anyone who trips an alarm that would prevent Venom from ruling over Eddie Brock. It is not like I am asking for a hand.
This practice would make screenings and interviews easier. If someone is only missing a pinkie, no big deal, we all make mistakes, and we will know that they learned from it. Now if they are down to one or none ring fingers, you know you will at least have to be patient with them. Otherwise, here is to hoping an elementary P.E. coach took the initiative to show them how to throw a fast ball and something off speed.
I am not that twisted. How dare I even contemplate not allowing everyone to partake in our national past time.
On the other hand, maybe I should consider allowing the removal of their weaker hands index finger. They may become healthier since they can no longer use the L (or R) triggers on a video game controller. If you cannot waste your time with Playstation, you should use it to play outside.
The downside to that, I have too many relatives that the outdoors have take finger portions from. And that is on my dad's, the genius (not hyperbole), side of the family alone.
Also, typing would be ruined with this plan. If only the pinkie was not responsible for the letter "A."
Regardless, I wonder if I can somehow get the guests' paper shredder to be locked in the on position. If you put a sign above it, surely the hotel cannot be held liable.
But, I digress, because I know people avoid reading if they can. If only we could mandate customers who press yes on the credit card application to complete the application. That will teach them. Or drive me nuts since I will have to read all the details of the application to them.
Lets face it, I am going to end up being driven insane or taking the wheel and driving off a cliff. At least I do not have to be worried about being caught off guard. And I will have all my fingers, so you'll have to feel sorry for me.
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