Pro-Wrestling and The Conservative Chicken Conspiracy

*Blog post started on April 21, 2020.

I have gotten to have fun with trolling conservative trolls on Twitter with the breakout of lockdown protests, but news just is not happening. Well, pro-wrestling wise is a different case, but to dive into that may expose some hypocrisies when it comes to my morals. I suppose that just makes me a middle-ground Democrat, but I dream of seeing a Chairman AOC.

All my sports fandom is screwed. WWE fired 40% of their workforce, a couple of dozen being on screen talent, after I suggested six onscreen performers (none of which were cut). The gut reaction would be to cut off my WWE Network subscription, but how can I resist the *"Dynamite Cop" ("Die Hard Arcade")* Money in the Bank matches?

Buzzfeed.com

*John McClane did not have to get to the roof to beat Hans Gruber, so "Die Hard" the movie comparisons are inaccurate. It would actually be better to compare these matches to "Critters 3".*

The only thing that hinders the next pay-per-view is that there are two of these corporate ladder matches. Making both matches unique will be hard to do. It probably would have been better to make one of them a traditional MITB instead. Of course, WWE and I are on totally different pages when it comes to wrestling-related decisions. As for ambivalence towards capital sources...

It seems that favorite football club, Newcastle United, is about to be sold to the Kingdom of Saudi Arabia. Seeing owner Mike Ashley leave should be a glorious occasion, but taking the piss out of the fanbase is what he lives for. Can I truly be upset? The Chicago Cubs are owned by TD Ameritrade who has quite a bit of hateful values, if hating how they are destroying Wrigleyville was not enough.

I left Peoria after I realized that my only longtime friend that I spent time with was a racist, self-absorbed, borderline sociopath (Who has a kid since then if you needed further proof the world is only chaos. I suppose that just makes him a true Mortonite.). Deciding to head to a liberal hub without aspiration to further my hospitality education may have been decided on by that point, but wanting to get away from negative people may have been that guy's actions alone. And then Donald Trump was elected that fall, so you just cannot run away from the rhetoric.

And sometimes you do not want to run away. Growing up, Domino's was the easiest pizza to get delivered and my parents did not care about their politics. My grandfather, on the other hand, hated the Catholic-tude. If we ordered it while my parents took my dad's parents to a dinner with older relatives, we were to dispose of the evidence before they got home. It was a good thing I was a teenager because we were allowed no leftovers.

I wonder if I should have told a story about my grandfather's racism. It could have been easily framed as him being a Michigan State University graduate, so fuck anything that came out of Ann Arbor. Until I realized how important it was to support you local minor league teams, going to see the Peoria Chiefs as a St. Louis Cardinals affiliate was a no no.

It is not like I do not try to be woke with the rest of my life. I have only once paid for Chick-fil-a, which should serve as a great example of how much I loved my last girlfriend and fought for that relationship. If you want to hate me, let it be because I eat fried chicken-themed fast food period.

The Conservative Chicken Conspiracy:

Check out the rest of the blog at the "Rip 'Em System" tumblr along with the subtext of "No Holds Barred."