MainEventofTheDead.com: I am the Depressed Kurgan

Monday, September 21, 2015

I am the Depressed Kurgan - Death or the Prize

I worry a lot. That is an understatement, but recently it seems to have totally shut me. All I can think is that with knowing my life has to change, it feels like that change will be an end to pursuing my passions, wrestling and writing.

It seems my existence will solely be about surviving. If I survive long enough, surely something good will finally come my way. Focusing on the pursuit of resources to sustain my survival is my only option, so I cannot chase down my dreams that are supposed to reward my dedication. My dedication was for not, hence I feel like I am a failure.

No one gives a damn about me now, so I guess going to a place where no one will care about me should not be as dramatic as I am perceiving. I am just sick of being nothing but a footnote in a world that rewards assholes. If the only thing I know about focusing on surviving instead of pursuing is that the inconsiderate will have the advantage, then I am not making a change. There is nothing life has to offer me.

If I don't have anything to say that kisses someone's ass, no one cares. If I speak my mind without issuing a single insult, I'm told I deserve my present predicament. My current world has justified why I don't have any value. Since I don't plan on changing from being honest and considerate, one would assume I'm doomed in the next world.

Thank God I'm an atheist so I shan't worry about the world after the next.

I suppose I shouldn't worry about any stage of my life. At best, my existence is neutral. Because I exist, people will tell me to cheer up. People will tell me that as long as I keep on living, I'll be fine. Countless friends have told me that I'd be a great husband or parent when that time comes.

But for the past seven years, all I am worth to anyone now is lip service. At 35 years old, why would I believe the person I am is worth anything more?

If I change, I may end up in a bigger location. Law of averages dictates there will have to be people who'll care about the person I am. When you've failed 300,000 times to find that, the likelihood is missing will continue. I'll have to rely on luck, and that means I've failed if the person I am can't get anyone to care.

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The Undrafted and Wrongfully Drafted

"Bull Durham" was not drafted on the Baseball Draft (A film that can only be drafted at #1)
"No Fear of a Black Hat" on the Fictional Band Mini-Mega Draft
The entire George Lucas Draft
"The Birdcage" instead of "La Cage Aux Folles" on the Drag Draft
"Road Trip" was not even mentioned during the Road Trip Draft
"Major League" instead of "Drop Zone" on the Wesley Snipes Draft
"Black Swan" instead of "Mermaids" on the Wynona Ryder Draft
"Akira" instead of "Ghost World" on the Comic Book Movie (Non-Super Hero) Draft. Tetsuo is a Supe.
"Now You See Me" instead of "Diggstown" on the Con Artist Movie Draft
"The Onion Movie" instead of "Everything You Always Wanted to Know About Sex * But Were Afraid to Ask" on the Sketch Comedy Anthologies Draft
"The Big Lebowski" not being marked eight on the Coen Bros. Draft
"Labrynth" or "Dark Crystal" not receiving the number 1 or 2 spot in the Jim Henson Draft
"Stage Fright" on the Giallo Draft. It is a slasher despite the presentation.
"Assault of Precinct 13" and "Prince of Darkness" Instead of "Escape from New York" and "The Thing" on the John Carpenter Draft
"Con Air" instead of "US Marshalls" and "Universal Soldier" instead of "Time Cop " on the 90's Action Draft
"WarGames" instead of "Spies Like Us" on the Cold War Draft
"Traffic" instead of "Side Effects" on the Steven Soderbergh Draft
"Fight Club" instead of "The Virgin Suicides" on the 1999 Draft ("Suicides" made the Actor Directorial Debut Draft)
Any Kirk Douglass instead of "The Shining" being on the Kubrick Draft
"Return of the Jedi" instead of "Tokyo Drift" on the Threequels Draft (there's only one "Return," okay, and it ain't "of the King," it's "of the Jedi.")

Deserves a Second Chance

Batman v. Superman: Dawn of Justice (2016).

I find the DC movies, or at least Zack Snyder, was trying to bring comic books to the big screen as opposed to adapting comic books for the big screen. If you read, (or watch the excellent animated adaptation of) "The Dark Knight Returns", it is a very slow build to the battle between the Bat and Supe. This is regarded as one of the best threads in comics.

As a guy who fell in love with wrestling in the 1980's, the very methodical showdown is what I loved. It's a love letter to comic book fans who read and note every detail and want to try figuring out the plot before the character do. Come at the flick this way, and I think you will get something out of it.

Tropic Thunder (2008)

This is a feature that dares you to be offended. When director Ben Stiller is that forthcoming like Robert Downey Sr. was with 1969's "Putney Swope", an audience saying that something is in poor taste, hence not funny, means they are afraid to make a mockery of a concept.

My own experience with junkies bankrupting me allows me to thoroughly enjoy Jack Black's making addiction seem ridiculous. Robert Downey Jr. nails his taboo performance and I would say helps the call for actors from a demographic to be the first people called on for the roles representing them. As for the "Forest Gump" knock off jokes, they serve as a way to ridicule us for what we accepted (and encouraged) as fine a decade prior. The narrative that controls the pace in the second act can drag, but the content that is delivered cannot be cut.

Monday, September 21, 2015

I am the Depressed Kurgan - Death or the Prize

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