MainEventofTheDead.com: Schrodinger's Cat or Lil Bub: Who Should be in the Box?

Saturday, August 9, 2014

Schrodinger's Cat or Lil Bub: Who Should be in the Box?

August 2, 2014

If a shuttle passenger says, "you drive like you are from Chicago". Is that an insult or a compliment? Immediately I think that I really need to pursue a hospitality career. My driving is at major metro mastery.

As I drop the seven guests (the vehicle was designed for six passengers) off at their destination, the one holding a bottle of Fireball criticizes my driving:

You need to be more professional when you have that many people in the car. And know where you are going before you say go.

There is a difference between hopping on the wrong way on I-74 and being ignorant. I suppose you can say that is the same as the difference between stupidity and ignorance, but I will call it instinctual. What is there in Peoria that's worth hopping on the interstate for? If you're at a hotel in Peoria, Illinois, it ain't for the shopping. You can at least gamble in Tazewell County. Or have the "Best Burger this Side of Paradice." East Peoria is all about the craps.

May be they were from Chicagoland and needed a break from the style of motorist I was presenting. On the flip side, even without my diversion into East Peoria, they should appreciate making it to the church on time. The five minutes spent bullshitting around to get ready for the shuttle was far more detrimental to their punctuality. No reason (since I was shorted $2 gratuity) for getting me into Audrey Hepburn zone. Just you wait Henry Higgins, just you wait.

Rationalization 61: Fund Me; Fight Me; Follow Me; Fuck Me

Read the rest of this blog and other stories at Main Event of the Dead.com and determine if this thought process can be translated into a B-movie comedy about pro-wrestling zombies.

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The Undrafted and Wrongfully Drafted

"Bull Durham" was not drafted on the Baseball Draft (A film that can only be drafted at #1)
"No Fear of a Black Hat" on the Fictional Band Mini-Mega Draft
The entire George Lucas Draft
"The Birdcage" instead of "La Cage Aux Folles" on the Drag Draft
"Road Trip" was not even mentioned during the Road Trip Draft
"Major League" instead of "Drop Zone" on the Wesley Snipes Draft
"Black Swan" instead of "Mermaids" on the Wynona Ryder Draft
"Akira" instead of "Ghost World" on the Comic Book Movie (Non-Super Hero) Draft. Tetsuo is a Supe.
"Now You See Me" instead of "Diggstown" on the Con Artist Movie Draft
"The Onion Movie" instead of "Everything You Always Wanted to Know About Sex * But Were Afraid to Ask" on the Sketch Comedy Anthologies Draft
"The Big Lebowski" not being marked eight on the Coen Bros. Draft
"Labrynth" or "Dark Crystal" not receiving the number 1 or 2 spot in the Jim Henson Draft
"Stage Fright" on the Giallo Draft. It is a slasher despite the presentation.
"Assault of Precinct 13" and "Prince of Darkness" Instead of "Escape from New York" and "The Thing" on the John Carpenter Draft
"Con Air" instead of "US Marshalls" and "Universal Soldier" instead of "Time Cop " on the 90's Action Draft
"WarGames" instead of "Spies Like Us" on the Cold War Draft
"Traffic" instead of "Side Effects" on the Steven Soderbergh Draft
"Fight Club" instead of "The Virgin Suicides" on the 1999 Draft ("Suicides" made the Actor Directorial Debut Draft)
Any Kirk Douglass instead of "The Shining" being on the Kubrick Draft
"Return of the Jedi" instead of "Tokyo Drift" on the Threequels Draft (there's only one "Return," okay, and it ain't "of the King," it's "of the Jedi.")

Deserves a Second Chance

Batman v. Superman: Dawn of Justice (2016).

I find the DC movies, or at least Zack Snyder, was trying to bring comic books to the big screen as opposed to adapting comic books for the big screen. If you read, (or watch the excellent animated adaptation of) "The Dark Knight Returns", it is a very slow build to the battle between the Bat and Supe. This is regarded as one of the best threads in comics.

As a guy who fell in love with wrestling in the 1980's, the very methodical showdown is what I loved. It's a love letter to comic book fans who read and note every detail and want to try figuring out the plot before the character do. Come at the flick this way, and I think you will get something out of it.

Tropic Thunder (2008)

This is a feature that dares you to be offended. When director Ben Stiller is that forthcoming like Robert Downey Sr. was with 1969's "Putney Swope", an audience saying that something is in poor taste, hence not funny, means they are afraid to make a mockery of a concept.

My own experience with junkies bankrupting me allows me to thoroughly enjoy Jack Black's making addiction seem ridiculous. Robert Downey Jr. nails his taboo performance and I would say helps the call for actors from a demographic to be the first people called on for the roles representing them. As for the "Forest Gump" knock off jokes, they serve as a way to ridicule us for what we accepted (and encouraged) as fine a decade prior. The narrative that controls the pace in the second act can drag, but the content that is delivered cannot be cut.

Saturday, August 9, 2014

Schrodinger's Cat or Lil Bub: Who Should be in the Box?

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