90 min. HBO Max: "Lost Boys: The Thirst" and C2E2 Sexualization Rant

*Blog entry started on February 24, 2020.

Everything should be lined up for C2E2, at least it should be when I retrieve the proper credit cards to charge everything on. The event also determined the cause for my tax refund which is difficult for me to figure out how to take (maturity/mentally). Is it a good thing to have money to spend on stuff I want, now realizing that there is stuff I want? Or is this a, "quit wanting shit" situation? Growing up sucks, and when you are coming up on a decadal birthday, you realize it is not getting any easier.

And there are not that many people who will go out and make it less painful. My better quarter (Eva the Cat will always get half) had her cosplay idea and it is of minimal effort. She wants to roam around McCormick Place in Pikachu hoodie and call it a costume. I have a Pokeball hoodie that she got me for Christmas, so we can do a group thing. My cosplay focus is how I can look good in a plus-size vest dress, which may not be possible, thus I will just be another jabroni wandering around with an Ultra Saber (or two). Can we really have that?

The girlfriend was insistent on going to Michael's when I visited my dad. Personally, I can just chill out with him bullshitting about sports and running political arguments by him that he will not curse me out over. With Mom chaperoning my youngest sibling to football games in England, why did I submit to her whims? Destiny perhaps. Thinking about crafting stuff led me to ask about some modifications to my proposed Pika Pal.

Would you be comfortable walking around with a ball gag?

Modify that bondage gear to look like Pokeball, buy some cheap sex toys at Spencers, we got something clever, which she even acknowledged. Pokémon Master and Porno Pika.

It's a family oriented affair!

Really? I have seen enough guys in tights who either needed dance belts or jockstraps. We would not have been that scary. It would have been a "The Lost Boys" R-Rating at worse.

And now I am wondering how to PG-13 BDSM. If only it was as easy as killing a few curse words and hiding some boobs.

Lost Boys: The Thirst - A Chance to Raise It on the Tomatometer

Check out the rest of review at "Ninety For Chill: A More Acceptable Runtimes

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Tag Team Wrestling Is the Only Future: The Disgruntled's Real Tag Team Champions Summation

After reversing course, it turns out that the amount of tag team champions was not as vast as I thought. It seems once a reliable secondary promotion or two arose, they knew they needed something that the WWE just was too busy to offer. This makes the current landscape with two successful televised promotions interesting.

Can AEW stick to the formula of having meaningful tag team wrestling headline weekly or will ratings dictate that they need a sellable superstar to get up them to two million viewers a week? With ROH seemingly being on the decline and Allysin Kay deciding to keep Impact's status as the promotion for abusive pariahs at the cost off woman empowerment (Your petty self could not wait till Tessa Blanchard's reign ended to unleash your bitterness and not spit on a step forward?), AEW may be the only place for the style. I am just curious about who AEW will name their cup after. Has WWE trademarked the word "horsemen"?

What is more pressing to me right now is finding out if I can complete this series of blogs in one entry? Only three years to go.

43rd to Last Real World Tag Team Champions:

NWA World Tag Team Champions: The Naturals (Chase Stevens and Andy Douglas) - 4/26/05 to 10/5/05

WWE had makeshift tag teams dominating both promotions before MNM took over Smackdown. RAW's champions were more or less celebrations of a successful angle (William Regal with Eugene/Tajiri and Hurricane and Rosey) and the Smackdown champions were more or less away a way to maintain the title of champion for Eddie Guerrero. ROH was focusing on BJ Whitmer as their tag team champion which seemed more like a recognition award instead of a top championship.

44th to Last Real World Tag Team Champions:

NWA World Tag Team Champions: Americas Most Wanted (2) - 1/16/05 to 4/26/05

Team Canada (Bobby Roode and Eric Young) - 12/5/2004 to 1/16/05

3 Live Kru (Ron "Truth" Killings, Jesse "BG" James, and Konnan) 11/15/04 -12/5/04

Check out the rest of the blog at the "Rip 'Em System" tumblr along with the subtext of "No Holds Barred."

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Rob Zombie's "Halloween": Treats, but No Tricks.

In 2009, Rob Zombie is the only gorenographic director I had not give a chance to. I was originally psyched about him getting behind the camera because of his animation and outspoken love for the horror genre. Hearing about his battle with the MPAA over his debut "House of a 1,0000 Corpses" also fueled this interest, but with the time between the rumors and release being lo long, I thought the film's delays were based around it not being any good.

Everything that I have seen from H1K only seemed to be disturbing, not necessarily gory. I thought it just seemed sloppy. Yes, that may be due to not watching the film from its beginning. Regardless, I was not inspired to see the sequel "The Devil's Rejects". If I was not going to see the film that was the basis for "Rejects", it would not be fair to myself to be lost in that tale.

Needless to say, I did not want to initially see him take on "John Carpenter's Halloween", an undisputed classic. Fortunately, it seemed like he took the right approach by giving Michael Myers a back story that most of my friends praised, but this did not reduce my skepticism.

It was going to take more to entice me to see a Rob Zombie flick. Unfortunately, the plot discoveries from the sequel and knowing Zombie did not want to initially direct a sequel to his vision, I spent my nine dollars on another 3-D horror flick that October. To bring order back to the cinema, I have to want to see Zombie's "Halloween" sequel. To do that, I will have to approve the original remake.

18 years after Michael Myers killed his mother's drunk boyfriend, his older sister and her boyfriend, and a school bully, he has broken out of the Smithgrave Asylum to reclaim the family that he spared. Whatever his intention, he will reunite with his little sister, and death may come to anyone standing in his way.

Rob Zombie should be commended for making Myers an actual character. The original Myers was a badass because he was just mysterious and evil. Once Jason Vorhees came along with a better gimmick, Myers was just a killer with a mask. There were more "Friday the 13ths" and the "Halloween" franchise could not catch up.

Now we understand this masked killer and his motivation. If he did not kill a cat early on in the feature, I would say he was sympathetic. Yes, he is a psychopath, but as the film states, it is because he does not know the right way to act. His realization of it makes him the most realistic psycho to date.

Tyler Mane (Sabretooth from 2000's "X-Men") was cast perfectly as Myers, and he was able to show, despite the limitations of the mask, that Myers remains human. Scout Taylor-Compton is no Jamie Lee Curtis, and Malcolm McDowell may have been trying too hard, but the rest of the cast does a great job. I would like to add that I do not know why people complain about Zombie casting his wife in his films. She does a great job in a role that is not psychotic. So I would assume she does a good job as a psycho in Zombie's cult classics.

Good acting and a strong, unique script means only one thing can make a perspective viewer hesitant. That is Zombie's ability to direct.

I cannot say that Rob Zombie did a bad job, but "Halloween" leaves me with the impression that he has no concept of what terror is. He concentrates so much on showing the audience everything, the viewer is never caught off guard. This makes "Halloween" feel long, and that is on top of being shy of two hours. In a sense, we are just watching a table read. Nothing makes us react, so when he is out of twists in the script, it is just Michael Myers without John Carprenter.

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90 min at $9.99 - "Rambo: Last Blood", Stallone Is a Sad Liam Neeson

I need to go to a Family Video at some point to check out what it costs to rent a DVD. $3.99 being a special rental rate for a movie on iTunes seems a bit high. It is especially high when you take into consideration that iTunes has a $4.99 for purchase section.

Yes, you can buy $4.99 DVDs and Blu-Rays at a video store, but those titles are far from new. A skip or two in "Suicide Girls Must Die" did not affect that film too much (as I predicted), but the stakes should be higher for "Rambo: Last Blood". On sale for $9.99 for a week (I would not be surprised if longer.), I thought purchasing it to ensure quality was a worthwhile gamble.

It has been 10 years since John Rambo had returned to the United States from Thailand, and the ranching life seems to suit him. He is now medicated, but old habits are hard to kick as he maintains a tunnel network under the family home. If anything, his paranoia allows him to be the perfect uncle to the orphaned Gabrielle who he has groomed into an equestrian ace and a scholar.

Despite having a loving family, Gabrielle cannot shake the feeling of being unwanted. This leads her to keep in contact with her delinquent friend Gizelle in Mexico. Her hopes are that her friend maybe able to locate the father who abandoned her. Gizelle succeeds and Gabrielle heads to confront him. Of course Rambo's niece does not know that Gizelle survives by working for a human trafficking's ring. When she does not return, Rambo throws his meds away and crosses the border with bringing along a hammer and a handgun.

Will the arms Rambo brought be enough to take her back? If you are the kingpins who took her, you better hope it is. He is only trying to be a hero. If anything happens to his family, you will be the target of his wrath.

Check out the rest of review at "Ninety For Chill: A More Acceptable Runtimes

9-Gag - We Can Relate.

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90 Min DVD: "Smash Cut": Minor League Soska Sisters

*Blog entry written on February 18, 2020

My life kind of feels like it is a holding pattern. I know I am a big advocate for patience and I seem to have a lot of it, but waiting drives me crazy as much as the next person. Not expressing my frustration with that (publicly) maybe my greatest strength.

It is not so much that I cannot do anything with myself. It is that any decision I make will not have any affect of me in the immediate future. C2E2 is next weekend. How am I going to afford to go to the show and afford a room? This spoiled soon to be 40-something has to wait and see.

Dad wants me to get the non-sports elements of the England trip planned out. How do I do that when I am not around him to review stuff with him? I am sure he would dig a play about the making of "Jaws", but I need to be for sure.

When can I move out and finally be comfortable? The answer is not until May at the earliest, so grin and bear it until then. Do I have the right to get upset at having to account for my better quarter's (Eva the Cat will always get half) absent mindfulness since we will not be living together after the lease? If I do not get hot about it, I will let her think it is cool to go around doing what she does to the next roommate.

Then again, truck drivers and warehouse workers do not seem to mind her. Why am I trying to make myself sound like a catch? They make more money than me. I guess they can afford to let people live more slovenly than my obsessive compulsiveness allows.

This could just all be related to the winter. When things warm up, things will get better. Of course, aside from sporting events, when do I really appreciate the weather?

I suppose the next rewrite of "Main Event of the Dead", my pro-wrestling themed zom-com, needs to change most of the scenes to exteriors. That way, I could use the natural light to shoot it instead of dealing with the expense of lighting a bingo hall. If you have any other ideas on how to get this project out of development hell, I will be happy to email you a treatment (drop me a line at russthebus07@gmail.com) in exchange.

Studying Lee Demarbre's "Smash Cut" at least made the past week worth noting. I had more fun watching "Knives Out", but aside from storytelling, I am years away from being worthy to study under Rian "Second Best Star Wars Movie" Johnson's learning tree. Canadians paying homage to Herschell Gordon Lewis and trying to get the most out of a nonexperimental performances from adult film stars seems like the right place for my filmmaking aspirations to be.

Check out the rest of review at "Ninety For Chill: A More Acceptable Runtimes

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TNA Is Worth Noting: The Disgruntled's Real Tag Team Championship History

IF ONLY I RECEIVED HATEFUL EMAILS AND TWEETS (@mainventzombie).

I am not saying that Impact is not a World Championship.

I am leaning to saying that it is not, but The Pride and The Powerful and the Lucha Bros both had a cup of coffee there. And when it comes to Total Nonstop Action, the Dudleys had shown they had showcased the importance of three championships already.

As I reviewed that statement in my last blog, it turn out my assumption was false. It surprised me how little contract disputes have not booked Ring of Honor into corners (and that is post Gabe Sapolsky). Sadly, it did not surprise me WWE just forgot to book these titles after they consolidated their titles with a admirable history. Admirable, unless you see it as an Attitude Era Redux. After  Carlito and Primo held them, only The Miz was established in the time of TV-PG.

21st to Last Real World Tag Team Champions:

TNA Tag Team Champions: The World Tag Team Champions of the World (2) [Christopher Daniels and Frankie Kazarian] - 6/28/12 to 10/14/12

Ring of Honor's tag team renascence has a few months before it begins. I had forgotten that The Colons (Primo and Epico) were even WWE champions for three months. Sandwiching their reign was Kofi Kingston and midcard weight R-Truth and Evan Bourne. The NWA had seeming dominant world champions, but it seemed like that was a result of not booking the championship rather than defending it successfully.

No IWGP?

If you tag with Karl Anderson, the West will want you back. But, there has never been a time when New Japan tried to show that their belts were more important than the Ring of Honor version. Having their World Champion defend his title successfully against the ROH's is why I considered that belt to be part of American wrestling. I cannot recall when the tag team title was booked in the same manner.

Check out the rest of the blog at the "Rip 'Em System" tumblr along with the subtext of "No Holds Barred."

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An End ROH's Relevance. A Conclusion to the Disgruntled's Tag Team Champs

When I originally wrote my series of blogs about who "The Disgruntled Real World Heavyweight Champion" is/was, 35 years of wrestling was covered within five blogs (1983 to 2018). With my current blog series about the tag team championship, 19 years had been covered in five blogs (1983 to 2002). The number of champions proclaimed in this series is the same as its predecessor (88), two belts are still recognized at that point (WWE World Tag Team Championship and the current incarnation NWA World Tag Team Championship), and the Ring of Honor and WWE Tag Team Championship are about to be introduced. This makes me wonder, if I should backtrack from the best tag team champions currently (January 28, 2019. I am leaning towards The New Day.), but there may even be more variables to consider.

Can TNA/Impact still be looked over? Has New Japan's influence come into play like it eventually did with the original World Heavyweight Championship? I shall not forget All Elite Wrestling.

I guess we are going into spoiler territory, but let me get to the idea of the "End is the Beginning is the End". That sounds more fun than transcribing my review for the too bad for Netflix Streaming "Skeleton Crew".

Championships that Will Qualify for the List:

• National Wrestling Alliance World Tag Team Championship - When WWE was building up Kane to be the ultimate babyface jobber for Triple H, he was the tag team champion with The Hurricane. Too prove how strong he was, Kane successfully defended the championship in a four-team TLC match only to lose the belts with his partner the next week. Because of its history of being fought over in WCW, the NWA title was still "relevant" and was getting coverage when it was shown on TNA. Christopher Daniels and Donovan Morgan became the inaugural ROH Tag Team Champions two days before America's Most Wanted captured the NWA title, but AMW was going to be the more memorable team. Here is hoping for a reunion like the Rock 'n' Roll Express on NWA Powerrr.
• Ring of Honor Tag Team Championship - The title got its legs when WWE was trying to establish the WWE Tag Team Championship on Smackdown. If you consider that WWE all but forgot about tag team wrestling when the Alliance angle first gave them multiple championships, there will definitely be points when ROH can claim to have the more worthy championship.
• WWE Tag Team Championship - If you are a fan of history, this has the lineage of the World Tag Team Championship.
• WWE Smackdown Tag Team Championship - It all depends of the booking when it comes to which WWE Tag Team Championship is more meaningful.
• All Elite Wrestling Tag Team Championship - Their first tag team champions, Frankie Kazarian and Scorpio Sky ended up defeating all of what had to be the most stacked tag team division at the time. The recognition may just be a blip because losing the championships to a team that is building for a Mega Powers Explosion may take some luster off the belts.

The Current (1/29/2020) Real Tag Team Champions: The Smackdown Tag Team Champions: The New Day (Big E., Kofi Kingston, and Xavier Woods) - Reign began on January 22, 2020:

It has been established for nearly two years that the dream opponents for The New Day was the six-person team of The Elite. That version of The Elite does not feature Adam Page.

Check out the rest of the blog at the "Rip 'Em System" tumblr along with the subtext of "No Holds Barred."

Invading and Evading: The Buffolo-Themed Disgruntled's Real Tag Team Champions - Part 5

*Blog written on February 10, 2020.

The Daily Buffalo Resolution winded up costing me $100 this past weekend. You cannot just go to Slim Chicken's on 50-cent wing day and just go back home for the rest of the weekend.

Were any of the items stuff I should have passed up. Maybe the Wii U copy of "Bayonetta 2" (with the original "Bayonetta") would qualify, but when most places charge 20 bucks for that combo, how do I resist 10? It also seemed to be the perfect accompanyment to the Nick Fury with Goose Funko Pop.

On the opposite end of the comic spectrum, perhaps I should have just stuck with Volume Two of "Joker/Harley: Criminal Sanity" instead of committing to Volume Three as well, but we do not want Warner Bros screwing with those characters again. Any purchase towards Gotham's criminal royalty should stop that, right?

I guess I cannot blame Slim Chicken's for the Bloomington trip the next day. And, it ended up being a good trip when I found the $40 yellow-soled, pastel tye-dyed All-Stars to replace the black ones that are still mudcaked from Riot Fest. What else would be appropriate for my fuschia pair to match with?

In the end, the only thing worth bitching about is that 20 wings were not enough. I rarely feel like a glutton, but there were no leftovers. It felt like I was placed in a tough spot. You do not want to advertise yourself as a fat ass by ordering 40 and then have a seat to dine. With only four TV's, behaving like it's a Hooters is wrong.

Oh how I miss Hooters. Why did I not just drive to Springfield instead? The better quarter likes to see new places.

At least there was no complaining about the one who is second to Eva the Cat. The shoes and underwear (Super Mario from H&M) she lead me to makes it seem like we are a good team. We are at least a better arrangment than the post WCW/ECW scene that follows.

The 72nd Real Tag Team Champions:

WWF's Brothers of Destruction (Kane and The Undertaker) - 4/1/01 to 4/29/01

The idea behind the title change was to set up the two main event heels to hold all of the championships at one time, so they were getting the most exposure possible (far more than the NWA's Bad Attitude [David Young and Rick Michaels] and Heavenly Bodies [Chris Nelson and Vito DeNucci]). It would also tease the Hardy Boyz as main eventers.

Check out the rest of the blog at the "Rip 'Em System" tumblr along with the subtext of "No Holds Barred."

"Aqua Teen Hunger Force Colon Movie Film for Theaters": Alphabetical Viewing Is Flawed

How I did I miss out on the "Aqua Teen Hunger Force" movie until two years after its release? It may have been too early for Adult Swim to release a film. It was 2006/2007, and when you add the failure of Robert Rodriguez and Quentin Tarantino's "Grindhouse", the general public was not ready to enjoy the charm of low-budget projects.

Thanks Quentin for fucking up everything you worked so hard to display. "Inglourious Basterds" may have been a spaghetti western, but with the production values of the project, it will only take true fans to appreciate the low-brow goals. The masses are asses.

Unlike the "Grindhouse", with just its limited animation, no one understood why people would see it after it tanked in its opening weekend. The cartoon that was with me through my decline into total loserdom performed no better than a "Forbidden Dance" flick, so maybe I was just struck too hard by this.

To pour salt in this wound, I never saw this disc for less that $20, so I eventually sold myself into accepting that it may not have been for me. I cannot be the fan they were looking for since I would not fork over the same cash I could spend on a season box set. Perhaps I should have just come to terms that I may never see this film.

For the past month (2009), I had renting a lot of movies. And a fair share of them, no one should pick up. If I am going to claim that I am a better critic than the punks from "That Guy with the Glasses" and justify my demand for a variety of B-movies to be shown at the Peoria Theater, I must give every, "this maybe cool" title a chance. Since I am only in the A's at Morton's video store, what other options do I immediately have anyway. I just hope ATHFCMFFT does not ruin the last couple of seasons for me.

I am a Cubs fan, so I hold grudges, and I will be pissed if ATHF did not deserve anything after this film. After watching "Absolon", it is just too much of a hassle to find out who will give me four hours back.

Check out the rest of review at "Ninety For Chill: A More Acceptable Runtimes

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