Showing posts with label Illinois Central College. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Illinois Central College. Show all posts

Wednesday, April 15, 2020

90-min. Prime Video - "Split Second": Plot Decisions, Action, and Kim Cattral's Boobs


*Blog post started on April 13, 2020.

It turns out my supposed wealth of rediscovered content may be for not. The memo pad I am transcribing right now has many movie reviews, and they all seem prepared for publication in the ICC Harbinger. When I look at how long it can take to get through an article from The Ringer (granted they use a much larger font), these are not nerdy website ready. They work great for 2002, the year of my web designer certification, but I cannot stay so far behind the times.

Here's to Verdana as maineventofthedead.com's official font. I imagine that could add another 15 pages to my pro-wrestling zom-com "Main Event of the Dead". If you have any suggestions on getting the production out of development hell, or if you want a treatment of this no-to-low budget film, feel free to email russthebus07@gmail.com.

The first review I transcribed was for the Brian Cox prison break movie "The Escapist", so I feel that I cannot really release it until I come up with another jail movie or a very British flick. Unfortunately, since Rutger Hauer cannot deliver a British accent, "Split Second" does not qualify.

I would like to get my review for "The Damn United" out this week, so I suppose I could tack "The Escapist" on to that and still not seem overly long. It just sucks that the blog was titled ""The Damn United" - A Real Life Jay & Silent Bob on the Pitch". "The Escapist" blog was typed up Friday which means that I may have wasted a Saturday with Pokémon, naps and "Tiger King". That could have made for a good Sunday due to the conclusion of Joe Exotic's story, but compare the Netflix series to a "Tron" marathon, "Thor Ragnarok" and "Westworld", we can all agree on what sounds better.

Split Second - 1992

Friday, January 17, 2020

"Equilibrium" - Christian Bale Polishes "Ultraviolet..."

...but a shiny turd is still a turd.

The difference between a good bad movie and a piece of shit is fun. Poor cinematography, bad acting, ridiculous scripts, these can call be forgiven as long as you are too busy having fun. "The Rise of Skywalker", "The Phantom Menace", and "Attack of the Clones" are films that I still enjoy because of my "Star Wars" fandom.

"Rise" has an incoherent script, but, I cannot help but  pop for the heavy-handed fan service. The second time I saw it in a theater, when I saw all the flash armada, tears were being help back at the beauty of the concept. "Menace" and "Clones" dialogue for Natalie Portman and Hayden Christianson is beyond awful, but the story it was explaining made sense to me. Who can be pissed at an abundance of Jedi anyhow?

If you go through my blog "Best 2019 Ninety-Minute (or 97 min) Films for Chilling", only two of the movies are undeniably good (I will argue that "Yoga Hosers" was exactly what it set out to be, but that may not make it good in the eyes of some.). Do I appreciate the excellent movies more? Yes. Do I frequently have more than an hour forty to devote to one. With two jobs and at least 20 video games to play, would you suspect that I did?

Well, if it is a monthly "Star Wars" flick, I will make the time for it.

The point is, if you want to get the most out your cinema time, you have to expand your horizons. Of course the downside is, 50 percent of what is out on the shelves is genuine crap.

Now, I have been able to make some films fun. Like "Ultraviolet". Surely by watching it enough, I can find a way to salvage and appreciate it. Timur Bekmambetov may have.

I am sorry, Timur did not. That is how bad the effects and direction were "Ultraviolet". They were so bad that I thought the film predated both "Night Watch" and "Day Watch". So, reopening a movie review (and ICC's Chinese 211) notebook and finding my review for "Equilibrium", a film by "Ultraviolet" writer/director Kurt Wimmer, spawned my justification for watching bad movies and brief reevaluation of having a website devoted to 90 minute films.

20 (give or take) new reviews posted last year, three to four were weak. This means I spent nine hours watching crap. If poop is not in my Pornhub search history, why do I let it be in my queues when I could catch up on my Scorsese? That is enough time to get three films in. Good thing one of them is "Taxi Driver" at two hours.

Reddit Quote Porn
Equilibrium

I could not have been the only one who was skeptical about any movie with this a quote from WBAI's nameless critic:
FORGET "THE MATRIX"! This Movie Will Blow You Away!
I suppose I should be skeptical of any quote formatted like that. Shout or get off the pot.

Action wise, "Underworld" eventually gave us a new approach to the sleek style of the Wachowski Sisters. Sci-fi wise, how can you dream of trying to capture what that film had? Also, the English leads in "Existenze" and "Equilibrium" added some unwanted pretention to the genre that was already overly pretentious to begin with.

It was not until "Ultraviolet" attempted to presented a world "you may not understand" that I dared to venture into Kurt Wimmer's bleak not so distant future(s). I figured 10 years had passed since super Jovovich from the "Fifth Element", so it was time to give the machine overlord-free future action flicks another chance. Unfortunately, Wimmer's film was too much about making the lead out to be hotter than Beckingsale and lacked any real substance. That was quite an accomplishment since the film featured both vampires and futuristic gun play.

Recently, some friends recommended Equlibrium to me. It has been a decade since "The Matrix" (The draft for this review was written in 2009.), and it is not a Bale sequel ("The Dark Knight" was bloated and wasted too many DC characters.), so it should be worthwhile...right?

I looked at the DVD's box to discover that is was also directed by Wimmer, so as an aspiring film critic, this gave me an opportunity. It would be a film that could be bad or good that should be nice and easy to view with no bullshit middle ground to describe. The problem now is the film's title is literal, "Equilibrium" is all middle ground and a waste of 110 minutes.

In the 21st century, a father figure had determined that human emotion has nearly brought humanity to the brink of extinction. With no perceived wants, hate and jealousy cannot exist because there would no longer be reason to use them. Love causes irrational acts, so it only hurts mankind.

As long as members of this society keep on their dosage of a drug to subdue their emotions, the world will prosper through conformity. If any member of the Libria has an emotion, they will be incinerated to maintain equilibrium. The Father's clerics are trained to search and destroy threats to the society.

Cleric Preston is the best, but after having to kill his partner over contraband, he is second guessing his purpose to exist. When he captures his partner's lover, he starts to learn what can be gained by having feelings. Now he must determine what is more important, peace or humanity. Stand and destroy nonconformists or attack and introduce the world to what they have lost.

As a director, I do not see how Wimmer has fans to support him. (Since he has not directed a film since 2006, I think this observation indicated that he does not have the fans suggested). Perhaps it is because of Gun Kata, "his" kung-fu gun play hybrid. To me, this is his clever way to cover up his inability to direct or write action sequences.

In his directorial efforts, Wimmer has few great action sequences, but they are not based on his attempts to rip of chapter 29 of "The Matrix". His protagonist effortlessly lays waste to armies of adversaries, and in "Equilibrium", it is pathetic to watch. The hero is never threatened, so there is no reason to feel involved. The viewer eventually wants the hero to take a slug or two.

Since he does have the ability to catch an occasional action scene right, he should not rely on tricks like scenes in absolute darkness. These scenes may show his vision as a director. It seems that he is trying to capture  storyboards shots, so actual motion is secondary. When one is directing a motion picture, to ignore the motion part makes it seem like the director has missed the point.

With "Equilibrium", Wimmer at least shows some ability as a writer. The world he created in this film is logical. Our hero has to overcome something that he is aware of, and the story tells his struggle well. Which is an accomplishment with all of the sudden twists that do not show up till the stories fourth act. It does seem to run long because the hero is trying to maintain his mental/emotional density. Again, you wish for something bad would happen to him for his own sake.

Bale is able to shine as the cleric. Like his performance in "Public Enemies", you can see his emotional struggle between what he should do and what he must do. With no Johnny Depp, to share the film with, it allows for a greater appreciation of his talents.

Of course, if he was going to do this in a flawed film, I would rather it have been in "Terminator Salvation", a film that only story problem is based to that series's continuity.

Seeing "Equilibrium" only encourages a subpar talent to remain subpar. Bale's performance is great, and the story is compelling, but the action will make the audience cringe. "Equlibrium" is "Two Girls, One Cup". It is fun to talk about, but not to watch.

Monday, November 18, 2019

Knights of Ramune: Blast Off...Like Cutey Honey

It is cool that Angelfire is still around. It is also cool that if you look hard enough, you can find most of the GeoCities websites preserved on a server. If only "@Midnight" was still a thing. It is a shame that they will never capitalize on that content.

Angelfire may have kept my post GeoCities/Web Design Certification (icc.edu) site up the past 17 years, but with Yahoo's betrayal, if you have not created an operating system, I am going to put all my eggs in one basket. Thus, I am going to start moving the original AnimeFlow over to the Blogger sphere. So let us get over one repetitive tangent (look at all the It and I) and getting into repeating my earliest critical works.

Knights of Ramune: Blast Off

Check out the rest of this critique at AnimeRuss.blogspot.com - For those curious about anime but hate the geeks

Tuesday, October 29, 2019

Airbats 801 - Iron Eagle 4

It is cool that Angelfire is still around. It is also cool that if you look hard enough, you can find most of the GeoCities websites preserved on a server. If only "@Midnight" was still a thing. It is a shame that they will never capitalize on that content.

Angelfire may have kept my post GeoCities/Web Design Certification (icc.edu) site up the past 17 years, but with Yahoo's betrayal, if you have not created an operating system, I am going to put all my eggs in one basket. Thus, I am going to start moving the original AnimeFlow over to the Blogger sphere. So let us get over one repetitive tangent (look at all the It and I) and getting into repeating my earliest critical works.

801 T.T.S. Airbats: 1st Strike
Image of Miyuki from VHS box.© 1994 Toshimisu Shimizu / Tokuma Shoten - JVC
Length: 90 minutes (3 episodes)
Audience Age: 12+

Opinion: Well animated, average story. This is a review of the dubbed VHS version.

From the creator of the hentai title Rei Rei


If you have seen the previews for 801 T.T.S. Air Bats, you probably were able to gain the basic premise of the series which is girls plus jets means $21.60 worth of entertainment. To a certain extent, girls plus anything out of the ordinary will bring some profit in this animation genre, and when a sensitive but less than with it guy is thrown in the mix, the creator is assured an audience. The concept is cute and one will laugh in an on again off again pattern, but if it is not a "Tenchi Muyo" or an "El-Hazard" video, the consumer may have some regrets about the purchase.


801 gets a few bonus points from me since learning about jets was once a hobby of mine, but otherwise it is a lot like what I expect from one of these "girls meet boy, they meet…what was that again?" animes.

Tuesday, October 22, 2019

It, I and "Sailor Moon S: The Movie"

It is cool that Angelfire is still around. It is also cool that if you look hard enough, you can find most of the GeoCities websites preserved on a server. If only "@Midnight" was still a thing. It is a shame that they will never capitalize on that content.

Angelfire may have kept my post GeoCities/Web Design Certification (icc.edu) site up the past 17 years, but with Yahoo's betrayal, if you have not created an operating system, I am going to put all my eggs in one basket. Thus, I am going to start moving the original AnimeFlow over to the Blogger sphere. So let us get over one repetitive tangent (look at all the It and I) and getting into repeating my earliest critical works.

Sailor Moon S: The Movie
© 1993 Toei Animation
Released in North America © 1999 Naoko Takeuchi / Kodansha, Toei Animation


Genre: fantasy (could be considered comedy, female themed)

Length: 60 minutes (theatrical film)

Audience Age: 3+ (If you view the dubbed version)

Opinion: The film shows the full potential of the possible stories that can be written for this series.

This is a review of the subtitled VHS version.

One of the first notable animes to get imported to the United States.



I know many huge anime fans do not consider Sailor Moon to be anime despite it being from Japan, but I think that maybe a tad unfair. 


Monday, September 30, 2019

2010: Russ Stevens - The AntiBukowski.

2010 may not have been a bad year. It just needed to be a great year after my 2009.


I probably did not notice how bad 2009 was since I wrote a lot more. It was not actually the writing, but more likely the publishing. That is weird because I did not have a lot to say, and it also led to poor writing habits. Damn the news media.


I do not mean the conservative bullshit that fed my depression upon returning to my parents in 2009, but the Illinois Central College newspaper, The Harbinger. Writing movie reviews, no problem. Writing opinion pieces, big problem. It was not the let down that I always had to endure when the satirical bite was removed, but is was wanting to save the ideas for pieces for the paper. Because of that, I was not writing the stories when they came to mind. Thus, my production was dramatically less, but the college audience was larger, so it was a necessary sacrifice. When you are an unattractive 29 year-old with nothing to offer, you have to take any attention you can get, even though it is more of a delusion.


Again, 2009 sucked. My highlight was selling out to a college newspaper. Based on that, wanting to kill myself if 2010 was not an improvement seemed just.


2010 needed to bury 2009, especially since I had just entered my third decade of being directionless. In all honesty, the lack of direction has been pressing on me since I turned 28 (all the cool people die at 27), but I could ignore since I was getting laid triweekly.


I know I will sound like a pig, but after an intercourse-free 2009, I could not go on if 2010 was the same. It is pitiful, but at this age, how else do I know if I am worthwhile? My therapy era started in 2006, the first year where I did not get any action since becoming sexually active, so does anyone want to invision where two nookie-free years would leave me.


2006 was a bad year for me, the bankruptcy I envision happening in 2011 came up that year in an attempt to be the most awesome of guys. The entire reason I went bankrupt was because that was what I thought was right. I would like to think I have always lived my life that way. Returning back to the Palahniuk attitude, if I would have died before the result could be witnessed, I would still die at peace knowing I was trying to do right. Unfortunately, I guess I thought there would be worldly rewards if I did not
.

Really, the reward could have been as simple as seeing something good coming out of what I was devoting my time and debt to. It was about proving that being a nice guy would be worthwhile. Instead, I am broken down by a junkie who would fuck everyone (dead beat dads, toothless addicts, fat fucks) except me. It was not about getting laid, it was more about not being the guy who was getting laid. What hurts more is finding out about the assholes she had screwed prior to meeting this nice guy and not even being offered to pay for the services she provided like the fatties got to.


Everyone I respect (and despise) seem to have gotten to end up with someone by age 27 where they had a chance to meet the one person that with a little faith (a huge demand of a relationship) they can be happy with. I am talking about something nearly tangible. Couples who got married or had kids. No, the happy ending may not be there for the relationship, but history cannot deny the greatness at some point. It just leaves me feeling like a fuck up, especially after the reinforced nice guys finish last stigma.


An unsuccessful Zoosk membership did not help the self esteem either.

January 2010: The Ghost Writer: War Criminals vs Pedophiles

So...the editors at the Harbinger, Illinois Central College's newspaper, expects their contributing columnist to walk by their office that is two stories above the only class he is attending this semester. It's funny because he only had to enter the office once in his three semesters of contributing.


Enough of this 3rd Person bullocks, makes me feel like those right-wing twats who were offended at my "Destroy Popular Culture, Rebuild, Repeat" shirt...at a strip club. Did one of the girls pay them off just, so I would plead for one of them to take me back for a dance?

The editor had told me, if they could pay me for my reviews and my opinion pieces, they would. Personally, I like not having the hassles of showing up to meetings, and if that cost me a few bucks, that no big deal. All I expect is an e-mail telling me when I have to get my shit finished.


Maybe it just slipped their mind, maybe the A&E editor saw a flick and wants my space, or the editor-in-chief did not like Ghosting my last opinion piece. Whatever the reason, I feel a little put out by a newspaper that hardly updates its website.


Yes, I guess I maybe taking the inevitable "sorry, we were so busy e-mail" too hard, but I have an ego, and when I do not do too many things well, failing to get published hurts.

After receiving the e-mail, it was a reality check. The staff simply had college things to do, the stuff that will further careers. Writing for a college newspaper is kind of a secondary thing in comparison. Like it or not, that is pretty accurate.


C'est la vie, I guess. With a Polanski movie review, that seems appropriate. As long as my works were not published for making an observation about pedophilia in this critique, everything will work out fine. I bought a domain for a reason right?


Exiled director Roman Polanski once again proves his brilliance as an auteur with his ironic tale of an exiled prime minister. "The Ghost Writer" is a film where the talent of the cast and crew shine as they present a rather uneventful story.



Supporting castEwan McGregor portrays The Ghost. His living is made by piecing the together the memoirs and irreverent thoughts of celebrities into autobiographies. His latest assignment is the task of telling the life story of the recently retired British Prime Minister Adam Lang, Pearce Brosnan. It should not prove to be too difficult since the last ghost writer for Lang had finished a first draft before he drowned off of Martha's Vineyard. That is until the UN calls for an investigation into the PM's alleged involvement in kidnapping terror suspects and handing them over to the CIA torture programs.


Because the US does not recognize the International Criminal Court's jurisdiction, Lang heads to Washington for the support from government that most of his decisions seemed to truly benefit. This leaves The Ghost left to entertain the PM's wife, Olivia Williams, and his own curiosity into the who, what, why, and how that led to the last ghost's fate. His impromptu investigation may not only uncover what happened to his predecessor, but also some secrets that may make him the next big threat to international security.

Image from film's posterOne has to be amazed at Polanski's ability to set a film in a country that he cannot even visit. The framing of each shot is near perfect, each actor nails their role, and the film's story flows very well. In many ways, it is an ideal conspiracy flick because of the lack of violence.

If people are talking about a conspiracy, all the violent acts happened in the past, and all that there is left to do is investigate. Oliver Stone bent a lot of truths for "JFK," but like Polanski, he knew that there was no place in the story for someone to get into a gun fight with Kevin Costner.

Unfortunately, this story is not based on the greatest conspiracy on the 20th century, so audiences may feel this film is missing something if McGregor is not using his Jedi skills to outwit assailants. Add to the fray that this film can seem to be rather insulting to audiences from the Red States. Polanski delivers a left hook to the US by showing the evils behind the motives of the last administration, and retracts from that strike with a backhanded slap about how the nation will not prosecute war criminals, but will never forget an all too common indiscretion.


"The Ghost Writer" is a piece of art, and like most great art, is not truly meant for mass consumption. It is an excellent narrative delivered by a marvelous director, but it is a film for a patient audience, and will disappoint anyone with preconceived standards of what conspiracy and espionage films from films with spies whose last names start with "Bo".