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Saturday, January 3, 2015

Cesaro Needs a "No Holds Barred" Sequel/AAW One Twisted Christmas

It's tough to be humorous at the end of the year. I suppose we've burned through all the humor by the twelve-month point. Hence, at a milestone like that, we find it best to just put out our year in review. Thus, the initial thought for this blog was to write "10 Things from 2014 that were worse than 'No Holds Barred,'" but it wouldn't be a compare and contrast. It would just be me bitching about:
  • The idiocy of having a feud between two people with the exact same of DNA (I bet one has highlighted hair so the E! News talking heads could tell them apart).
  • The "Ryback Isn't that Dangerous" PR tour (and Chris Jericho's hypocrisy).
  • How come an injured champion was stripped of their title for failing to defend it in two months while a healthy one doesn't have to defend theirs for four (I already have the kayfabe answer, but that's like stating why there were obviously black stormtroopers)?
Fortunately, I remembered that I had just finally gotten around to watching "Jackie Brown," starring Tiny "Zeus" Lister, instead of drinking in downtown P-Town, fearing the concept of making conversation with old high school relations I never had anything in common with.

Sorry Pittsburgh and Philadelphia, but only Peoria, Illinois, can claim to be the one and only P-Town. It was Kurt Angle who noted on the April 23, 2002 taping of "Smackdown" that the city's name sounds like a urinary (a pee) infection. Since my a Yinzer made the argument, my hometown claim shant be disputed.

Why Haven't We Gotten the Next Tiny Lister?

I know, there will be a lot of people who probably say the first time they remember seeing Lister as a pivotal character was in "Friday" portraying the antagonist, Deebo. And I'm certain they're lying. Lister had many supporting roles, but did he ever get a poster until NHB? You couldn't ignore the coverage wrestling (cable's powerhouse programming until people started paying $16.95 for HBO) gave him. He may have never been on "Saturday Night Live," but he was on "Saturday's Nights Main Event." Good or bad, NHB did a lot for his career in entertainment. This man is the absolute go to when a director needs an intimidating black heavy or planetary president (regardless of color), all because he was in a WWE Films' release.

Check out the rest of the blog at the "Rip 'Em System" Tumblr.

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